Ratpiles!
I posted on Facebook that I was tackling “ratpiles”. Someone asked, “What’s a ratpile?”
To understand ratpiles, you have to first understand rats. A ratpile is created by a family of rats. Once started, ratpiles grow almost organically. One item mislaid on a counter by one rat is an open invitation to the other rats to add their odds and ends to the ratpile. The motivation to contribute to a ratpile is due to one or more of the following reasons:
1. It’s an ”ignorant rat” and doesn’t know where it’s supposed to go. Or…
2. It’s a ”lazy rat”, and simply doesn’t want to bother. Or…
3. It’s a “busy rat”, and doesn’t have time to put it away.
Note: While there’s no legitimate excuse for any of the three ratpile motivations, alot of rats will claim to be a “busy rat”, but really is just a “lazy rat”. Either way, HE, err, I mean “it” is just a “RAT”!!!
Here’s the pathetic thing. I’m the Rat who started the ratpile on our laundry room counter. But it was purely innocent, and not attributed to any of the three reasons that categorize me as a rat in the truest sense. I laid the dogleash on the counter, because it’s by the backdoor that leads outside. I wanted to keep it there, so that when I take Marley in the car, I can grab the leash on the way out the door. See? I did it on purpose, and it was purely innocent. I wanted the leash to be able to “live” there, alone. Ha! Fat rat chance! In the flash of an instant when I first laid the leash there a few weeks ago, I thought, ”The rats are going to think I’m starting a ratpile. But I’m not! This cannot, and should not become a ratpile! I simply won’t allow it.” But the invitation was made, and the rats RSVPed. In the eyes of the rats, a ratpile was in its infant stages and had to grow into a full grown ratpile!
The next day, I noticed the leash on the counter was accompanied by a flashlight. I let it go. Big mistake… I went out of town for four days, and when I came back and wanted to put Marley on his leash, I had to plow under a huge ratpile consisting of: A tape measure, a sash for a robe, a hammer, a dish towel, a half empty water bottle, swim trunks, and a baseball belt. A baseball belt? It’s not even baseball season!
If you’re considering starting a rat family and allowing ratpiles, just know this… In rat families, there are designated areas that are grandfather-ed in as ratpile zones. Even I will turn a blind eye for days or even weeks, as long as the ratpile is starting and building in a designated ratpile zone. A designated ratpile zone is one of usually about two or three areas of the house that typically are proned to be hosts to ratpiles. It doesn’t make it quite so bad, if you’re accustomed to seeing ratpiles beginning and thriving in a desgnated ratpile zone. They almost become invisible over time. But…
Don’t try to start a new ratpile zone! For a few days in a row, Greg started laying a jacket and hat on a chair near our entry way. That chair was becoming his new coat rack! First of all, this is a “ratpile foul”, as there has never been a ratpile zone in our entry way! And it’s NOT going to start now! To make matters worse, I could see it coming… There was a small end table next to the chair. Nothing had been laid on it yet. But horror of horrors! I KNEW what would become of that chair and end table, if I let it go for even a moment. Not going to happen on my watch. “Either hang it up, or start a ratpile in a designated ratpile zone!”
Phew! So glad I nipped that in the bud!
